still one of the best things ive ever seen.
slaughter melon reporting for duty.
BROCONUTm a n g ERI NE
too good to not reblog
How can I not reblog slaughtermelon?
isn’t bombegranite cucumber an actor
I knew that was coming
WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT
YOU COULD BE A FUCKING BADASS DRAGON THAT’S THE POINT
"I AM A CREATURE OF DARKNESS" "oh hey sabrina."
I guess the point is that you could shapeshift into the body you always thought you’d grow into when you were a kid
taller, shorter, slimmer, more muscular, purple hair, tattoos everywhere, tattoos nowhere,
every single shoe would fit you every single time you tried it on, every single article of clothing would fit your perfectly, all you have to do is transform slightly, you’d never run out of ‘your size’ again
and you wouldn’t have to work for it at all, and you’d never be limitted by your bone structure or something. You could just transform at will.
I don’t see how this is much of a downside
When you turn into a sixty story tentacle demon and terrorize a city you want to get the credit you deserve
Oh man that would be so sweet. I could be an annoying fuck as an insect or something but you couldn’t kill me because everyone would know
That’s great but have you considered
~stretching to reach stuff and shrinking to fit through spaces
My mother in a nutshell…
HOW WILL I DIE?
"Suffocated by everything"
……. Wait, isn’t that just normal life?
Fucked by EVERY MEMBER OF LIMP BIZKIT WOW THANKS
assassinated by pro lifers
seems accurate tbh
Crushed by my Existence? OMG…
Penetrated by everything.
Skinned Alive by every member of Limp Bizkit
((Fellated by my failures. Just. Wow.))
Fellated by meth addicts.
Penetrated by life…